The Genesis Line

A R T I C L E
The Genesis Line
By Indira Neville

Struggling to understand and organise the music in your life?! The Genesis Line is a complex, yet easy to use system, and is likely to be the answer you seek. Created by Indira and Stefan Neville, Indira provides the low-down.

The Genesis Line is a nuanced and complex tool developed as a means to discuss and define the bands and musicians in your world; improving your general health and wellbeing in the process (you know, in a Gwyneth Paltrow kind of way but much more sensibly and less expensive). The Genesis Line has no cost or copyright issues, which means you can start using it as soon as today! It works like this...

After extensive research, Genesis (the Phil Collins version) was decided upon as the world’s most competent band, and the best at doing what they do (personal feelings towards them are irrelevant). It can therefore be used to calibrate ALL other bands and musicians via something called the ‘Genesis Line’.

A line, similar to the Genesis Line

Simply put, the Genesis Line can be used to do this in three main ways, each slightly more complex than the last (although experienced users can usually manage all three in tandem).

Firstly, you can use it simply to rate bands you like. The higher above the Genesis Line you place them, the more you like them. The lower down, the more you hate them. U2 are so far down they are in Hell.

Secondly, it is a tool which allows you to finally decide your feelings about those bands upon which you are on the fence. If you decide to place them just above, you realise you like them a little more than you hate them; just below and it’s the opposite.

Finally, it can be used to make decisions about how good you think bands and musicians are at doing what they do. This can be challenging and when combined with the ’like’ method may offer some interesting and often contradictory results.

For example, if you were to rate Ed Sheeran in regard to how much you like him, he would sit below the Genesis Line. But if you were to rate him according to how good he is at what he does, he would have to be above. Of course there are those rare and fascinating musicians who achieve an ‘above’ result in both categories. Take Cyndi Lauper for instance. She is universally loved and brilliant at what she does. Hence she soars high above the Line.

The Genesis Line can get very complex when considering bands with members who then had individual careers. Nick Cave for example (in both the ‘like’ and ‘competence’ categories) would be way below, while The Birthday Party, equal or just slightly above (this is a use not recommended for beginners).

The most meta example of the Genesis Line comes when you consider the band Genesis itself. The Peter Gabriel line-up would be below, but solo Peter Gabriel above. Solo Phil Collins would probably be on the Line itself. 

We will conclude by saying that the use of the Genesis Line is personal and its results may legitimately differ amongst users. Also, like any theory it can be challenged. Its creators however, have never had cause to regret its use.

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